Ready for a deeply rewarding life?   973-610-7031 lisabrick@powerandpurposecoaching.com
Shopping for Thoughts

Shopping for Thoughts

When we recognize we don’t have what we need to “get the job done” whether it is clothing so we can show up a certain way or tools to complete a project we’ve launched, we have a few choices. They are to give up on our objectives, make due with what we have, or go out and shop for whatever we need to accomplish our goals. We have the same options regarding our thoughts. If our negative thinking is leading us to give up on our objectives, feel incapable or insecure, or continually uncomfortable “making due” we can begin to “shop” for new and more effective thoughts that allow us to accomplish the personal goals that mean so much to us. (more…)

Car Follows Focus

I recently finished reading Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein, an amusing and heart warming book.  The art of automobile racing was one of the themes within its pages,  and the racing adage, “Car  Follows Focus”. It says that while racing, the driver’s hands follow  her eyes, the wheel follows  her hands, and the car follows  the wheel or,  extrapolating to the broader experience of life, the destination in which you are heading is determined by where you are placing your focus. In the book, a driver avoids a multi-car pile up by focusing on the narrow strip of grass adjoining the track and beyond, not on the unfolding disaster in front of him.

I’ve been reflecting on the truth of this adage in my experience.  It is clear to me that when I shift my focus from what I am displeased with to what I desire,  pathways open up.  I begin to experience the  freedom to move towards that which I desire rather than being stuck in place with that which doesn’t please me or seeing myself heading towards an experience I would rather avoid.

After I was diagnosed with Polycystic Kidney Disease I focused on the available information which explained the possible and projected  impact of the disease.  While my focus was there I was a stressed-out mess.  When, after months of suffering,  I asked myself what it was that I wanted for my life, I realized that I wanted a life of health and wellness regardless of the diagnosis.  After that realization I headed in that direction and rarely looked back.  Even while planning for open heart surgery and transplantation I kept my focus on that patch of green on the side of the track where wellness was to be found!

It is an investment of awareness and energy to ask ourselves “What is it I really want to experience?”  The return on that investment is a life of unusual and rewarding satisfaction, in all circumstances.

Best herbal remedy acts internally and addresses the underlying structural issue that is causing a patient’s pain and dysfunction and severe headache as a result of deeprootsmag.org buy levitra wholesale it, that this type of surgery may be appropriate. The market is flooded with ordering levitra numerous medications which ensure a healthy erection for pleasurable intercourse. Firstly because it can be easily remedied by making sure you drink the cost of viagra enough water. Drinking your sex life away Too much alcohol can have an adverse effect on your viagra without prescriptions canada health. Our lives have strong similarities to the racing experience for the spirit.  We qualify at conception.  Our vehicle is our mind/body.  We pass the starting line at birth.  The track is the seasons through which we go round and round.  Our finish line? Death, at least with this unique mind/body. Speed is optional and driver’s choice.

On the track, no matter how familiar we may think we are with it, we encounter unanticipated and unexpected conditions.  We take pit stops and utilize teams that assist us with repairs and motivation! To enjoy the adventure of the race, to learn the full capability of our vehicles, to ride all out, and to take our place among the greats who came before us and who will come after us when we cross that finish line – what can be more exhilarating?   This race is about the quality of the ride.

Focus on what inspires and moves you and you will be inspired and moved in that direction!  Simple yet profound.

This post was first published at MakingMindMatter.wordpress.com in 2011.

 

Be Proud of the Room You Have to Grow

Be Proud of the Room You Have to Grow

One of my clients rang last night. Today was to be her first interview with a Fortune 500 company since she received her Masters Degree the previous spring.  It was for a position custom fit for her skills, passions, and purposes, almost.  As she reviewed the job description closely she was stopped cold by two required competencies that are not her strengths.  These two areas, out of a myriad of others, loomed immense as her confidence began to crash. 

 

This was NOT the energy she wanted to present during the interview.  “Hi, I am presenting myself for this position that I would really like to fill but I am not the best candidate because….” was not going to cut it.  What to do; be authentically apologetic about her weaknesses, in authentically try to finesse them as strengths, or stay quiet and pray they didn’t come up?  Apologizing is disenrolling. Pretending to have competencies in areas where you don’t puts both the hire and the company at risk.  This is when we discovered a course that was completely authentic and provided a clear and compelling path forward!

 

She could be as proud and confident of the areas in which she had room to grow as she was in the areas in which she already excelled.   She could communicate excitement around the opportunity and her willingness to expand her competencies and create additional value for herself, the company, the team with whom she would be collaborating, and their collective vision of an increasingly healthy and rewarding world.  This is exactly the perspective that will usher in economies that create healthy profits, people, and planet in this time of quickly changing contexts.
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She rang again tonight, pleased with the interview!

 

 

 

Failure, A Necessity on the Road to Success?

Failure, A Necessity on the Road to Success?

Most of us are paralyzed by  failure.  We were given a toxic message about failing, that failing is bad and wrong.  We were taught to avoid it in school, in relationships, and in the workplace, and by doing so we could avoid the self and public disapproval that accompanied it.  The pain we feel when we fail, combined with our tendency to go into blame and/or self recrimination, keeps us off the road to success.  On this road of avoiding failure or not admitting it’s signs, we gloss over and neither see our responsibility for being where we are nor are we able to learn from our experiences.  This road stays raw, the ride bumpy, and the destination  dangerous.   Today there are new messages about failure, enlivening messages that tell us not only is it unavoidable to fail, it is integral on the path to success.

 

These new messages tell us that our failures are the paving stones to success as long as we pick ourselves up and go forth with expanded understanding and wisdom.    Kathryn Schulz, one of the authors sharing a new perspective on failure writes in Being Wrong: Adventures in the Margin of Error; “Of all the things we are wrong about, this idea of error might well top the list…It is our meta-mistake: We are wrong about what it means to be wrong. Far from being a sign of intellectual inferiority, the capacity to err is crucial to human cognition.” Kathryn believes that we are designed  to learn from our actions, those that work the way we want and those that don’t.  To play it safe is to stifle our ability to learn and grow.

 

Ralph Heath, managing partner of Synergy Leadership Group and author of Celebrating Failure: The Power of Taking Risks, Making Mistakes and Thinking Big writes “Failure and defeat are life’s greatest teachers [but] sadly, most people…don’t want to go there…Instead they choose to play it safe, to fly below the radar, repeating the same safe choices over and over again. They operate under the belief that if they make no waves, they attract no attention; no one will yell at them for failing because they generally never attempt anything great at which they could possibly fail (or succeed)..” How many relationships, positions, and ventures have ended because of this fallacy?

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While the two authors above speak to corporate culture, the same holds true for personal culture, whether overcoming a failed relationship, a tanked business venture, or navigating a health challenge. To achieve your goals, to make what at first seems highly unlikely possible, you must embrace your failures, learn from them, and treat yourself with grand compassion and love as you rise from the ashes, brush off the dirt and move forward one step at a time.  It’s scary not knowing how one step will lead to the next, or if these new steps will lead to where you want to go, yet staying on the ground really isn’t worthy of who you are and what you are capable of.

 

Of course, assess the steps you are thinking of taking next carefully.  Simply hoping for the best is not a viable strategy.  Be willing to look in the mirror, do the work, and create strategies and take actions that are specific, measurable, reasonable, and achievable given what is already on your plate.  Hold yourself accountable in real time.  Allow yourself to assess your skills and talents realistically, with kindness. Use your talents to your advantage and seek out new skills that will allow you to navigate your path with more resiliency, balance, and bounce in your step, and with eyes wide open. Use your failures to inform your ability to achieve successes, one small step at a time.  Make your failures the paving blocks of your success.

For more on skill sets for creating healthy intimate relationships, visit “Creating a Co-Independent Relationship” at  http://www.powerandpurpose.net/2012/08/03/creating-a-co-independent-relationship/ .

Bringing the Mind and Body into the Same Time Zone

Bringing the Mind and Body into the Same Time Zone

During coaching sessions it is often evident that my clients’ minds and bodies are in different time zones, especially during periods of greatest discomfort emotionally.  Their minds are either in the past or the future, experiencing upset about what has happen or what will happen, while their bodies are in the present moment experiencing anxiety and an incapability to take effective action.  While the mind can “time travel”, the body lives always and in all ways in the present moment.  Actionable steps, of which the mind is the architect and the body the general contractor and construction crew, are only possible in the present. As long as the body and mind remain in different time zones the body is stuck, anxious, and impotent, unable to take effective action.  Instead of the mind/body being “here now” consciously and creatively taking action they are “nowhere” being ineffectual.

 

When the mind is grounded and centered in the present, it is aware of what it is doing.  When grounded and centered in the present it is either seeking clarity regarding what it desires or, having reached clarity of its goals and objectives, designing strategies that work in harmony with the bodies’ ability to take action in a grounded, balanced, and centered manner. The present is the only time zone in which the mind can manifest creative action through the body, in a succession of single actions, one by one, here and now. The present is also the only time zone where together, mind and body can harvest, enjoy, and truly relax into the bounty it created. 

 

How is it possible to bring the mind and body into the same time zone, especially when surrounded by situations of duality and chaos? Infinitely, with practice.  A simple and highly effective way is to mentally note one’s breath and its consequences.  The following is an exercise you can play with and choose to practice any time you notice your mind and body are in different time zones:

 

On your next breath, notice the sensations that occur as you breathe in and out.  On your inhale, how do your nostrils feel as the air passes in? Do they spread or quiver? Does the air feel warm, cool, or neutral as it enters and touches your temperature sensors?  Where do you feel the sensation? Are your sinuses clear? How does your throat feel as the air passes through on its way to your lungs? What happens to your chest cavity as you inhale and your lungs fill?  Or perhaps you notice that your lungs aren’t filling, that you are taking little sips of air and your chest is barely moving.  Play with your breath.  As you breathe in more deeply or less deeply, what happens to those small muscles that assist your rib cage to shape-shift? What do you feel when you breathe out?  Is the air the same temperature as when it entered?  How does your rib cage change? What message are your receiving from your body, if any, are you becoming aware of as your focus enters the present moment and joins your body? Do you feel vitality in your body, tiredness, a sensation of pain somewhere, pleasure, or perhaps various sensations in varying areas? Simply notice your always present partner in life, your body. Notice you are together now, in the same time and place, the present moment here and now.  How do you feel differently now that you are all in one time zone?

 

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Discover and practice remaining in the present, discern what it is you really want in life, and design conscious and intentional action steps to manifest yourself as designed through coaching.  A conscious, intentional life by your design is possible, available, achievable, and awaiting your embrace.  Sign up today for a complementary coaching session to experience the positive power of you.